Wild grass and sweet lemon;lately he has been thinking about you. Vine leaves and dill;he wants to quiet the thoughts. Paprika on roasted peppers;he kisses the back of your neck at the stove. Rice and cinnamon custard;you offer him the hollow of your throat. Ripe tomatoes and walnut oil;you don’t ask him if he’s still with her. Nutmeg on sourdough;you let him lift you by … Continue reading The Last Supper

You and I have never met many times before. Our paths might have crossed once or twice, standing in a line, passing in the street. But, against incredible odds, we miss each other every time. Accidental strangers who just happened to miss their cue. Neither having any idea that the other even exists. It’s hard not to wonder where you are right now. Veering away, … Continue reading Him

A painful feeling of distress caused by an unpleasant self-conscious emotion typically associated with a negative evaluation of the self; withdrawal motivations; and feelings of distress, exposure, mistrust, powerlessness, and worthlessness. “We can get rid of that you know. All of the stuff you think you need; we can make it really unpleasant for you to engage in” he says so matter-of-factly. “Because you can’t have … Continue reading Shame

It was cold. The first cold night of the year. Forcing to the surface a nostalgia of eerie winter nights. I called him, uncertain if he would answer. He did. 4 hours later and my tear stained cheeks still hadn’t dried. It had been so long since we spoke that I forgot how hard he made me laugh. Uncontrollable, abdominal contracting, almost embarrassingly loud laughter. … Continue reading Tears

All the girls you’ve ever loved, I think I loved them too. Interlude for the grand sonata. Every mouth you’ve ever kissedwas just practice, all the bodies you’ve ever undressedand ploughed intowere preparing you for me. I don’t mind tasting them in thememory of your mouth. They were a long hallway,a door half-open, a single suitcase still on the conveyor belt. Was it a long … Continue reading Home

I hear her calling to me; the world. I hear the crashing oceans, and the salted air. I hear the heat in the back seat of the yellow taxi, and the suitcase the size of myself. I hear salt forming on the top layer of my skin, white dust on brown burns. Honey on fresh yoghurt. Books bent by the sun, warped by droplets of … Continue reading Her

My pallet has lost its vibrancy, colours mixed in the wrong equation. My paintbrush has dried up, boar bristles jagged and harsh. My toolbox, playing hide and seek. I stare at my canvas and despise what I have created – dullness – I loath it. The theory has overpowered the aesthetic. The rush has displaced detail, and my lust for beauty is hibernating. I know … Continue reading Words

Once you love someone, can you ever really un-love them? Once you truly feel love, what happens to it? Does love spontaneously combust? Or does it stay there, missing you, waiting patiently for the moment you’re ready to be loved again, if ever? The other day I visited my father, he was renovating my grandmothers house, I met him in a dusty kitchen while he … Continue reading The Architecture Of Ended Love

I spent almost four years in a toxic semi-relationship, a relationship where the more he didn’t want me, the more I wanted him, and the minute I gave up, he would reel me back in. I was endlessly fascinated by this – I am an attractive, hilariously funny, and occasionally intelligent woman – He was handsome… and that’s about it. What was I doing? It’s … Continue reading The Anatomy Of Pseudo Desire

I accidentally got stoned. How does one accidentally get stoned you ask? Well, I was hungry, at a strange house party, and a plate of brownies was left unattended. I was ravenous, so I ate four of the delicious brownies. An hour and a half later and I was hearing secret codes and hidden meanings in Led Zeppelin’s Dazed And Confused. What had happened to … Continue reading The Doors